Worth beating yourself up over

Much like Diver Down wouldn't have been a complete album without Eddie Van Halen's "Intruder", your Eddie V's meal won't be complete without these diver scallops plucked straight from Georges Bank, then blackened using a house-secret spice recipe, drizzled with lemon beurre blanc, garnished with chives and red pepper, and topped with bleu cheese from Maytag Farms, the best thing to come out of Iowa since Chris Kingsbury.