Your secret pizza portal to the most delicious street in Napoli

While Portland is clearly better than Seattle, there're some things they have that PDX doesn't, like the Space Needle, dudes that throw fish, and an NBA team headlined by the one and only Kevin Durant. Oh, wait a minute... For a Seattle mainstay that's a-OK(C), get to Via Tribunali, opening tomorrow.

A longtime Emerald City favorite, Via's the only pizzeria in PDX certified by Italy's Associazione Pizzaiuoli Napoletani (untranslatable), meaning you can expect authentic Neapolitan pies from a beautiful blue- and white-tiled, wood-fired brick oven surrounded by a Coppola dream of dark wood booths, a sleek bar pumping out coffee and 'tails, an Old World-y mezzanine, and the ceramic head and shoulders of a female baker, who's obviously quite busty. Helmed by a master pizzaiolo from Naples, Via's pies're built from strict ingredients like imported Stagioni flour, San Marzanos, and mozzarella di bufala flown in fresh each week, all of which hits the aforementioned oven that burns through 200lbs of applewood a day (at 1200 degrees) to cook the delicious disks in 45 seconds flat -- suck it for a full 15 seconds, Giovanni Ribisi! With 20 perfectly charred thin crust pies on the menu, you'll be forced to choose between the parmacotto prosciutto/ oven-roasted mushroom/ artichoke/ olive-topped Capricciosa, the Italian sausage & rapini, or the fresh mozz/ goat cheese/ olives Formaggio Caprino, all of which should probably be washed down with 'tails like the Italian Manhattan, which if you've been there recently, is like one store selling soccer jerseys and a whole lot of Chinese people.

Knowing even the most authentic Neapolitan pizza you've ever had is not enough for you, Via will hook you up with desserts like a chocolate/hazelnut calzone, which pairs well with their Caffe Vita Espresso, a Seattle export the city's actually happy about.