A 4-year-old invents the ultimate breakfast cereal

Ultimate Breakfast Cereal
Grant Marek
Grant Marek

Remember in Mighty Morphin Power Rangers when they'd be fighting a bad guy with their robots and start losing, and then be all, "Screw this, let's just put all of our robots together into one super-robot that will totally dominate", and then (duh) they'd totally dominate? Yeah, well, we decided to do that with cereal, taking the best part of every single awesome cereal and putting it all into one amazing bowl. And to help, we enlisted the foremost authority on sugary cereal: a 4-year-old.

Ultimate Breakfast Cereal
Grant Marek

First order of business? Picking out an entire box's worth of Lucky Charms marshmallows.

Ultimate Breakfast Cereal
Grant Marek

Yep. Entire box.

Ultimate Breakfast Cereal
Grant Marek

Next: an entire box's worth of just the red Froot Loops. Obviously.

Ultimate Breakfast Cereal
Grant Marek

"Yep, no poison here!"

Ultimate Breakfast Cereal
Grant Marek

Oddly large Honey Bunches from a box of Honey Bunches of Oats? Check.

Ultimate Breakfast Cereal
Grant Marek

Did you know that, when you remove all of the Berries from a box of Cap'n Crunch Berries for an Ultimate Breakfast Cereal, you're left with... regular Cap'n Crunch? (Cue flashback to the first time you saw Inception.)

Ultimate Breakfast Cereal
Grant Marek

This thing doesn't actually have any Cinnamon Toast Crunch in it.

Ultimate Breakfast Cereal
Grant Marek

But it does have a half-gallon of Cinnamon Toast Crunch leftover milk, which does a body (sorta... actually not really any) good.

Ultimate Breakfast Cereal
Grant Marek

And here you have it: Lucky Charms 'mallows, red Froot Loops, Honey Bunches, and Berries from Cap'n Crunch Berries, poured in a bowl along with a half-gallon of Cinnamon Toast Crunch leftover milk.

Ultimate Breakfast Cereal
Grant Marek

"Ahhhhhhhhhh."

Ultimate Breakfast Cereal
Grant Marek

The taste? Imagine every good thing that's ever happened to you in your entire life (that time you got TWO bags of Bugles from the vending machine, that time the Giants won the World Series, that other time the Giants won the World Series...). Now imagine all of them going into your mouth in marshmallow form. Yeah, it's delicious.

Ultimate Breakfast Cereal
Grant Marek

Especially if you like diabetes.

Ultimate Breakfast Cereal
Grant Marek

Party.